Invarus (Excerpt)
Creative Writing, Fiction, Writing

Invarus (Excerpt)

I started writing when I was 13. I had a vague idea for a book, and some scattered bits of imagery. I wrote my first chapter, made some world building, then continuously rewrote and edited over and over again. I went through phases where I kept a single narrative going for a while, my two longest were around 20,000 words each, but I would always eventually feel dissatisfied and restart. As time passed and I got better at writing, I was able to preserve more material and repurpose them in my later iterations of the narrative. My current iteration is a fusion of my main project and a side project I wrote when I got bored. Over this last year, I’ve spent most of my time working out kinks and issues in the logic of the world building, and in understanding narrative structure and character. I can’t say the story fits my original vision for it all. In the process of improvements and amendments, the narrative has changed in ways I couldn’t predict.

 

——-

Pain washed through Keltrinne’s body. She contorted, writhed, then rolled off the top bunk into open air. 

Keltrinne hit the ground.

F–k. God.

Too much pain to describe. Her breath ejected with the impact and something else began to take its place, trickling down and settling in the base of her lungs.

“Wha…What?” A breathy voice sounded above her, “Hello?” It said, and then, “Keltrinne?”

“Keltrinne?” The voice repeated louder. Wood creaked, and a mass landed beside her in the darkness. Keltrinne heard clothes rustle. A finger touched her body.

Avidia prodded the lump on the floor, “Keltrinne!” She hissed but received no response. Avidia charted the darkness with her hands and found Keltrinne’s shoulders,
“Hey!” she whispered and squeezed. 

Keltrinne broke Avidia’s grip with a violent jerk. A crack broke the air of the barracks, and their bunkbed shook.

Zoka’s dreams died. She sat up in her bed with a sudden movement, just saving her forehead from a collision with the too-low ceiling.

What on Earth?

Zoka cast her gaze to the floor of the barracks beneath her bunk, the source of the noise, but it was too dark to see. She heard a hard intake of breath, then a soft heave a moment later. Zoka frowned. She threw off her covers, turned onto her stomach, and shot her legs over the bunk’s edge. Zoka grabbed the planking of the bed, and with a swing, she landed on the ground in a squat.

Avidia had raised Keltrinne into a bridal carry, and was in the midst of hauling Keltrinne to the barrack’s entrance when she heard movement behind them. She turned towards it, “Help me.” she whispered.

Silence. Avidia felt the urge to keep moving, but then a voice came, “Did something happen?” 

“Keltrinne’s hurt. Come quick.” Footsteps approached, and another pair of hands joined her in carrying Keltrinne. Avidia felt Keltrinne spasm. She cursed, “Gentler gentler.” Avidia cautioned.
“Got it.” Her helper replied. They hurried to the end of the barracks. Avidia parted the entrance flap with her shoulder, and they passed through into the lamplight.

Multi-floored barracks bounded Avidia’s sightline. They had large lamps at their corners and smaller fixtures placed at even intervals along their walls. Windows were in minimal use, only present on the first floor on the side facing the currently empty courtyard before them. None of the windows could be seen through, all their shades were drawn.

Avidia looked down. Keltrinne was blue and red. A lump had appeared on her ankle, and there were deep bruises under her skin across her entire body. Her throat was undulating, and a soft stifled noise emanated from her mouth. The color drained from Avidia’s face. 

“What?” Zoka said, “What the f–k?” Avidia kneeled slightly. She lowered her grip to Keltrinne’s waist and began to prop Keltrinne upright with her shoulder. “What are you doing?” Zoka said. Avidia glared at her from under Keltrinne’s arm. 

“She’s choking.” Avidia growled and pushed up to her feet. Keltrinne sagged in her arms like an oversized stuffed toy. Zoka released Keltrinne’s legs and stood hesitantly by the side. Can I help? She thought, but Avidia paid her no attention.

Avidia nudged her arms up to the center of Keltrinne’s stomach, and let Keltrinne droop down with gravity. She flattened her palm against Keltrinne’s navel, placed her fist on top, then pulled.

Keltrinne’s stomach constricted. Her lungs emptied into her mouth then out, the contents forming a red pool on the ground beneath her. She raised her eyes and found Zoka standing across from her. Something like a smile was on her face but not quite. The arms that held her lowered her to the ground, and she saw the owner, Avidia. Avidia looked so relieved.

No no, her thoughts were growing sluggish, I’m not fine. I’m not okay. Don’t let me die. She tried to cry out, to tell them what was happening to her, but found herself unable to speak without air. 

Avidia sat on the flagstones and waited for Keltrinne to come to, but it didn’t happen. Keltrinne lay limp against Avidia’s body, her chest unmoving. 

“Is she dead?” Zoka said. Avidia stared at her dumbly, “Is she dead?”

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June 6, 2023

About Author

Aidan van der Merwe

Aidan van der Merwe Aidan van der Merwe is a senior at Northwest Academy, an aspiring novelist and a reader of speculative fiction.


ONE COMMENT ON THIS POST To “Invarus (Excerpt)”

  1. I tried to enter the world of Invarus and got very disoriented very rapidly. Leading me into your world is the WORK of writing.

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